If you’re reading this, it’s too late. Or whatever Drake said. (Lol) Hey ya’ll !! I’m a day late and a dollar short with today’s blog post. However, I do not plan to miss out on many Sunday Pleasure post. But in the event that a post or podcast doesn’t go up on a Sunday as it’s supposed to, we will have an honorary name for Monday post. Let’s call it Mindful Mondays. Yes, I like that ! Now, before we begin, lets set the scene…. I’m currently sitting in my favorite spot on the couch listening to “Yet” by Maverick City Music ft. Chandler Moore & Ashley Hess. When I tell you…. please listen to this song. The fireplace is lit, my stanley cup is full of cold water, my silk robe is laying against my oiled skin, and my face is moisturized to the BONE. Lol, no exaggeration. & now that the dramatics have commenced, lets begin. I’ve spent the bulk of my time this past week meeting new colleagues in office after two weeks of remote training. After brief introductions, I jumped right into it. “What is your current role in the organization? Are you fulfilled here? Why this position?” This is something I do in any organization I enter into because it’s always interesting to learn and understand someone’s reason for carer choice. Speaking for myself, I love when someone seems interested in knowing mine. I’ll be more than happy to share it with you all as well. Ten years. One decade. That’s how long it has taken me to get to where I am today. In April of 2013, my childhood friend passed away giving birth. An experience that was supposed to be monumental, happily celebrated, an experience that was supposed to be joyous, quickly turned into a tragedy. It left all who knew her with so many questions. Questions that even with the answers it still wouldn’t be ENOUGH. This is where my journey into the mortality rates of African American/minority women began. I now had my own questions that needed answering. The journey was everything short of quintessential. In fact, it was the very opposite. My journey lacked structure, my journey was full of roadblocks, but through it all I persevered. Which led me to this moment where I sit in a full circle moment. And even at this very moment, this is only the beginning. Back in June, I began my process of becoming one of New York City’s newest Public Health Advising Officers in the Bureau of Maternal Infant & Reproductive Health aiding in helping to bridge the gap between providers and mortality rates in minority woman and babies within my city. Major health disparities. Wait….. Let me sit in this moment right here….. Because…… Is this thing on ??? Because…… GOD doesn’t miss. Ever. I needed to be here. I wanted so desperately to be here. I knew that I needed to make a difference. I knew that I needed to help keep these beautiful pregnant mothers alive for their families, for their children… I never once forgot my “WHY“. And I need for you to never forget yours as well. This is so very important. And here is WHY: Knowing your “Why” in life refers to understanding your purpose, values, and motivations. It involves having a clear sense of direction and a deeper understanding of what drives you and gives your life meaning. Knowing your “why” provides clarity about your goals and aspirations. It helps you define what truly matters to you and what you want to achieve in life. This clarity allows you to focus your time, energy, and resources on activities and pursuits that align with your purpose, making you more effective and fulfilled. When you have a strong sense of purpose, it becomes a powerful source of motivation. Your “why” acts as a driving force during challenging times, helping you stay resilient and persevere through obstacles. It provides a sense of meaning and fulfillment, making it easier to overcome setbacks and stay committed to your goals. Knowing your “why” serves as a guiding principle for decision-making. It helps you make choices that align with your values and long-term vision. When faced with dilemmas or opportunities, understanding your purpose allows you to make decisions that are in line with your authentic self, leading to greater satisfaction and a sense of integrity. Exploring your “why” involves introspection and self-reflection. It encourages you to delve into your passions, strengths, and values, leading to a deeper understanding of yourself. This self-discovery process fosters personal growth, self-awareness, and a stronger sense of identity. When your actions and goals are aligned with your purpose, you experience a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction. Living a life that is congruent with your values and passions brings a deep sense of meaning and contentment. Knowing your “why” allows you to create a life that is authentic and fulfilling. I spoke to a friend yesterday and they said “La, you always do what you say you’re going to do”. And it made me realize just how important it is that I keep the promises that I make myself. I have to honor what God puts on my heart, because when I do, that’s me connecting to my purpose and life path. I truly wish for you to do the same. Whatever it is that you want to do, please do it. Do not focus on the length of time that it’ll take you to get there, just start. Begin, push through, and finish. You deserve that feeling of fulfillment. You deserve the feeling of completion. You deserve a full circle moment. This moment of my life is monumental. An entire decade of hard work, dedication, resilience. My friend did not die in vain, and I will carry her name through this entire journey with me until I’m able to put her name on one of my Women’s Wellness Centers. This is for the girls on the grind. This is for my ancestors. This is for the generation after me. This here is for Rickma P. Thomas and the many others who transitioned during childbirth. I will NOT let you down. They let the right one in the door. I can promise you that. #blackgirlblog #childbirthmortality #mortalityrates #infantloss #publichealth #sheshed #healthdisparities #blackgirlwriting

Now I’m not sure who this new person is, but she was on her ZOOM before 10 AM. It’s currently 9:56 AM on this lovely Sunday morning and I am fresh off of my 4.7 mile walk. Yup, I hit the ground at 8:06 & haven’t looked back. I even took a new route this morning to the park to neighborhood/ house watch. One word: BREATHTAKING. Everything about this neighborhood spoke to me. I am in total awe. It reminded me instantly that what I’m working towards is closer than I think it is. Whewww, I said a word there, So here I am, listening to my favorite Lo-Fi Chill station on Apple Music, sneaking glances out the window at the beautiful trees, savoring the few moments that we have left of Summer ’23 and must say, this year flew by. And because of this, life moved so quickly around me and I had to sit and prioritize what needed my attention most and least. And that is where my brief hiatus began. Life is a beautiful yet complex journey, filled with ups and downs, twists and turns. Sometimes, amidst the chaos and demands of our daily lives, we find ourselves needing to take a step back and focus on our own well-being. It is during these moments of self-reflection and self-care that we truly discover who we are and what we want from life. After a brief hiatus to focus on yourself, you emerge stronger, wiser, and ready to embrace the world with renewed vigor. So here I am. Let’s talk about it. I’ve spent the bulk of my break away from blogging and podcasting working on a few projects in both my work and personal life. From the birth of my Floral design company, to a career pivot, from the birthday vacation of a lifetime, to earth shattering news. This period of life is showing me that no matter what- we aren’t as in control of our lives as we’d like to think. It’s like, you can line up all of your marbles perfectly, and then one gust of wind or bump to the table can send them all rolling. You get my drift? During my time away, I zoomed in more on the importance of self-care. I learned more about the power of self-reflection. I rediscovered passions and interests that I let fall to the side. I embraced change and growth and I will say, it was very uncomfortable but necessary. I even fell back in love and binged watched some of my all time favorite tv shows like Ugly Betty & Gossip Girl. I reached my body goals and ended up with both a foot and back injury after consistently hitting the gym 3-4 times a week, eating more protein and going on weekly Sunday walks. I flew to see Beyonce in Miami with the love of my life. WHAT AN EXPERIENCE. We hit the runway again and landed in Colombia to finish off my birthday celebration. I lost 5 lbs. by eating like a pig and drinking like a fish. (America is the DRAMA). I lost a loved one tragically and grief knocked me down for two weeks. And as I navigate through this all, I still remain gracious. I am a very, very blessed girl- indeed. I’m currently invested in me, and I am growing to love the space that I’m in. I’m focused on expanding my career, pursuing my interests, and achieving my goals. Still trying my best to be supportive and loving to those closest to me, but this period of my life is so personal. Last week, I made it to Barnes and Noble for their annual end of summer sale and returned home with 11 new books. I actually just finished “Seven Days in June” by Tia Williams and I have mixed emotions about the ending. It felt very rushed to me, and in my opinion, she could have elaborated so much more on so many things but…. that’s just my opinion. Next up, I’ll be reading “Before I let Go” by Kennedy Ryan. I love Fall reading. It just makes so much sense to me lol. Not saying that I don’t read throughout the year because I do. But Fall book shopping and reading is so spiritual like to me. It’s Fall in general. It’s like a reset. An ending to the summer and a beginning to the second half of the year. A constant reminder that dying things like trees and leaves are beautiful and living things can grow from death situations (fresh spring blooms from the same tree that dead leaves fall off of). By the time you read this, S2: E1 of The She-Shed Podcast- Sunday Pleasures will be live and I’d love for you to check it out on all platforms: Spotify. Apple. Google. Taking a brief hiatus to focus on ourselves is not a sign of weakness; it is an act of self-love and self-preservation. It is during these moments of introspection that we find the strength to overcome obstacles, pursue our dreams, and live a life that aligns with our true selves. So, if you find yourself needing a break, don’t hesitate to take it. Embrace the journey, and return with a renewed sense of purpose, ready to conquer the world. Remember, you are worth the investment of time and energy it takes to focus on yourself. I am extending myself grace and allowing myself to just exist. No longer worried about destinations, just falling in love with the journey. Until next weekend my loves. Stay sweet. xoxo, La. #blackgirlblog #blackgirlwriting #sheshed

As we live in an era of intense competition, many of us feel the need to constantly push ourselves to do more and be more. However, this lifestyle can often lead to burnout and exhaustion. But it is possible to find balance in our lives and embrace a softer lifestyle, manifesting the best version of ourselves. In this blog post, we will explore how to make this transition and lead a softer life in today’s competitive landscape. Is it even possible to define the Era you currently reside in within today’s society? I mean, after all, we can literally get online and live whatever life our big imaginations desire. But, let’s be honest with ourselves, what Era are we truly in? Hmmm, no, let me get a little more personal, what Era are YOU currently in? As for myself, I am certainly in my disciplined era. There is a lot of slow progress, small wins, and hidden sacrifices taking place that no one really gets to see. Maybe they never will, and that’s okay with me. However, I am so proud of what I’ve been making real of myself. I want to take a dive deeper into the Era we all seem to find ourselves visiting. It’s an era of intense competition. Everywhere we look, there is pressure to be the best, have the most, and do the most. Social media has amplified this pressure and has created a culture where everyone is constantly comparing themselves to others. We are living in a time where the cost of living is becoming increasingly expensive, making it harder to keep up with the Joneses. Everyone wants to live a “Life of Luxury” and is striving for the perfect life. It’s overwhelming, to say the least. I have some advice for you: If you spent as much time keeping up with other people’s lives as you did focusing on your own life, your reality would drastically improve. Less focus on what others are doing, and more focus on yourself. So, how can we navigate this Era with a sense of ease? One way is by embracing a softer lifestyle. This lifestyle is not about being weak or lacking ambition; it’s about creating space in our lives to prioritize our mental and emotional well-being. It’s about finding balance in a world that seems to be constantly pushing us to our limits. By adopting a softer lifestyle, we can experience numerous benefits. We can reduce stress and anxiety, increase our self-care practices, and improve our overall livelihood. Practical ways to embrace this lifestyle could include things like spending time in nature, that’s right, go outside and touch some grass ! Also, by engaging in mindfulness practices, prioritizing rest, and taking part in creative activities. Let’s face it, life can be tough, but it doesn’t always have to be that way. Embracing a softer lifestyle can allow us to enjoy life’s simple pleasures and find joy in the little things. It’s time to let go of the pressure to be “That girl” or the “clean girl” and focus on what truly matters: our own happiness and overall well-being. The discipline required to better yourself, your environment, your relationships and everything else adjacent in your life is extremely difficult. The easy route is to be comfortable and stagnant. But when you have a certain vision of your life, it’s very worth it. But in today’s era, THE PRESSURE IS ON. Social media platforms like Instagram and TikTok constantly bombard us with images of people living what seems to be an expensive life filled with material possessions and experiences that we feel we need to keep up with. Instead of constantly striving for more, we should learn to be content with what we have and find joy in simple things. A life of excess is not the goal. Imagine having a career you love, waking up next to the love of your life daily, and living in a home you’re proud of; your circle is solid, everyone is healthy, amazing memories are made often, and no anxiety, just real peace and true happiness. But with all the pressure and competition in today’s society, this type of life can feel unattainable and out of reach. Instead of focusing solely on material success and external validation, lose the desire to be hyper-visible and accessible and lock in with yourself and get shit done. Start a new career path, launch that business that you’ve been holding off on, start your fitness journey regardless if no one wants to join you. Whatever it is, DO IT. Tap in with yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, financially. There’s no better feeling in life than actually having your shit together instead of just “looking” like you have your shit together. Prioritize yourself in every aspect. I know I spoke about mental health alot in a recent post “A SOUL THAT GLOWS.“, but I truly cannot express it enough that it all begins there. By prioritizing mental and emotional health, please understand that true happiness and fulfillment come from within. Make time for self-care, rest, and relaxation, be intentional about your relationships and how you spend your time. Instead of constantly pushing yourself to the limit, listen to your body and your emotions, and make decisions based on what feels right for you. This approach can have profound effects including reduced stress and anxiety, improved relationships, and greater resilience in the face of challenges. It can also lead to a more balanced, satisfying life, where success is defined not just by external achievements but by internal happiness and peace. Whatever Era you are currently in, slow down. The world puts so much pressure on us to speed and produce quickly. In the midst of living we miss the beauty and benefits that come with taking life slower and steadier. I used to think “Soft-life” was a destination after grinding for a while to have success. Now, I see it is much more about your relationship with yourself. Keeping balance at the center of all pursuits. It isn’t about materialistic things, but about how well you can maintain your own inner peace in the midst of whatever is thrown your way. That softness and ease despite what’s going on… that’s the softness of life. In this Era, I wish you a life of ease. No hardships, no unnecessary struggle, nothing but peace, comfort, and joy. Prioritize your well-being at all times. “Take my advice, live a better life.” Or whatever Future said. Until next time my loves, be great. xoxo, Elle Cee #blackgirlblog #sheshed #softgirl #softlife #aesthetic #blackgirlwriting